Email: Mr Huu Can Tran – Innocent Until Proven Guilty! (23.1.2023)

Dear Gillian

OK – so this is a Chinese-language comment left on one of the articles concerning Mr Huu Can Tran (innocent until proven guilty) which reads:

‘一个人走过海旁,看见另一个人想跳海自杀。 他走上前去劝说「先生,不要跳下去!」 那人问道:「为什么?」 他说:「生命是美好的嘛!你是无神论者还是有宗教信仰?」 那人答:「我有宗教信仰。」 「佛教、道教、回教还是基督教?」 「基督教」 「罗马天主教还是新教?」 「新教」 「我也是新教呢!圣公会还是浸信会?」 「浸信会」 「太好啦!我也是浸信会,你是Baptist Church of God还是Baptist Church of the Lord? 」 「Baptist Church of God. 」 「真是太奇妙啦!我也是,那你是原教旨的Baptist Church of God还是改革派的? 「改革派的」 「1879年的改革派还是1915年的?」 「1915年的改革派。」 那人朝他屁股一脚把他伸进海里:「异端!去死吧!」’

Translation:

‘A man takes a walk by the sea and comes upon another man who wants to commit suicide (by jumping into the water). He steps forward to persuade him to stop!

He calls out, “Sir, please don’t jump!”

The desperate man asks, “Why?”

The first man explains, “Life is beautiful! Are you an atheist or do you have a religious belief?”

The desperate man replies, “I have Religion.”

The first man asks, “Is it Buddhism, Daoism, Islam or Christianity?”

He receives the reply, “It is Christianity!”

First man, “Roman Catholicism or Protestantism?”

Desperate man, “I follow the path of Protestantism!”

First man, “I’m Protestant too! Perhaps I can help you! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?”

Desperate man, “I am a Baptist!”

First man, “That’s good – I’m a Baptist too! Are you the Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?”

Desperate man, “I am Baptist Church of God.”

First man, “Are you Reformist or Non-Reformist?”

Desperate man, “Reformist!”

First man, “Almost there! Reformist 1879 or Reformist 1915?”

A loud ‘plop’ is heard…

(The last sentence is implied in the Chinese-language text but does not actually appear in words – all part of the humour).