Noel’s House Party!

A ‘Traumatised’ Noel Clarke On the Set of Dr Who!

During this time of great upheaval and search for social justice, it is remarkable that Noel Clarke has been singled-out as a ‘Black man’ accused of being a sexual predator on the sets of his numerous TV drama projects – predominantly by disaffected ‘White’ women! The plot thickened recently, when the renowned ‘racist’ Daily Mail printed a story suggesting Noel Clarke was ‘caught’ licking David Tenant’s nut-sack between takes on the Dr Who set! Allegations such as these appear to be absurd and the product of jealous ‘White’ women purportedly ‘cold-shouldered’ by Clarke when he was experiencing what his Agent described as a short lived but intense ‘gay phase’. During this time, the Dr Who storyline suggested that Noel Clarke’s character was ‘in-love’ with fellow cast member ‘Billie Piper’ – a ‘White’ woman that a ‘gay’ Noel Clarke found it difficult to look at without feeling physically sick! In an interview with ‘NUTS’ magazine, Noel Clarke explained ‘it was a terrible and soul destroying time! There I was contractually committed to 20 episodes of Dr Who and suddenly I found myself going through an extreme “soul searching” crisis! Luckily for me, David Tenant was very understanding. He allowed me a 10 minute nosh-up on his nuts every time BEFORE I had to go on set to ‘kiss’ Billie Piper! And yes, this is exactly where all my current troubles started! A friend of Billie Piper was secretly filming behind the scenes for a DVD Extra – when she sneaked into David’s Dressing Room and caught me going for it whilst David indifferently “read” aloud from Hamlet!’ The sheer absurdity of the situation gave David Tenant the idea for his hit Lockdown TV comedy series entitled ‘Staged’ – although Noel Clarke could not star in it – as he did not live with either David Tenant nor Martin Sheen at the time.

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