Who won the Tyson v Jones Jr fight? Covid19 – that’s who. Michael Buffer ‘announcing to no one’ was like the eery beginning of a classic James Wan horror movie. ‘Let’s get ready not to be physically present!’ Other than that, the bout reminded me of a Ouija-board consultation attempting to communicate with the ‘spirits of boxers past’! Knock once for ‘yes’ and twice for ‘no’ (which I think was the ‘scoring method’ involved). No wonder Snoop lit-up a spliff as a means to make sense of it all. Come to think of it – that is probably why the bout was declared a ‘draw’… I hear the ringside doctors actually checked ‘for signs of life’ between rounds and at one point used mirrors to see if both men were a) breathing, and b) still capable of breathing!
Don Kong tried to hijack the broadcast and ‘project’ a remote image of himself in front of the ring – to give the false impression that he had something important to do with everything that was going on. When he realised a death from natural causes could happen at any moment – he quickly attempted to reverse the process.
Of course, I jest. Tyson was the clear winner. He achieved the ‘cleaner’ of the leaning attempts – a skilful execution that sometimes saw both his shoulders simultaneously make contact with the body of Roy Jones Jr – as both men ‘bounced’ up and down in an unconvincing manner (as if they couldn’t remember how to do – or were not sure if their fitness would hold out beyond the periodic requirement to ‘stand up’).
It was heart-warming to see how both men cooperated with one another to stay in a standing position during the two minutes of ‘fight’ time. I got the feeling that if they could have done – they would have helped each other in the corner. What we learned from this was that Jones Jr still possesses the ability to stand on front of an opponent in a potentially ‘threatening’ manner – whilst Tyson can now run across the ring with his feet spread far apart in potential ‘readiness’ to throw a devastating punch.
Yes – this was a match of theoretical ‘potentials’ mediated through 12 oz gloves. This much (and more) could have been achieved if both men stayed in their dressing rooms and shadow boxed in front of the mirror. Such was the bizarre background to this ‘fight’ – as each fighter possessed no timing, balance, reach, coordination or even commitment to knock one another out – that ‘counting punches’ seemed a tad ludicrous and an entirely superfluous undertaking. Of the two – Tyson seemed the most relieved it was over. Again, for his honesty and new found maturity – I give it to Tyson.
Satire aside – I recognise and appreciate the bravery of both these men – and as I am of a similar age (and still train in Chinese martial arts), I know how difficult it can be to keep in-shape like a young man. This is particularly true for an ‘external’ sport such as Western-boxing which awards hard power, brute force, and a certain youthful finesse, etc.
Being continuously hit around the head as a means to entertain a fee-paying audience is immoral from a certain point of view – particularly as it is a Human Right (in my opinion) not to be hit anywhere by anyone! Both men were Masters at their absolute physical-peaks – perhaps their Mastery today is more to do with their awareness, judgement, compassion and understanding.